Archive | March, 2010

What is said v. What is Heard

24 Mar

I’ll admit straight up that I have a problem.  Seems like in some conversations – both personal and professional – I hear one thing when something else entirely is said. 

Why is that? 

For example – my girlfriend here at work made a comment yesterday that she knows I’m in a relationship because my midsection had gotten a little thicker. 

And that really – truly – made me neurotic.  To tell you the truth, with this recent bout of ick (see the below post), I haven’t been eating much and I know that I’ve lost some weight. And I know that I  wasn’t big to begin with.

When I got home last night I took a good long look in the mirror and came to the conclusion that I look the same now as ever. 

So I ran into my girlfriend at work today and told her that I had a bone to pick with her.  And I explained that her comment had me going neurotic yesterday and that today I’m wearing a size 6 skirt and it has room!  She said that all she said was that she can tell I am in a relationship.  And she also commented that I was neurotic before she said anything and before I met her here.  While the last part is true – I was / am / will be (however you wish you structure the sentence) – it aggravated the ever-living out of me that I heard her comment one way (and yes, she did say the part about my midsection) and it sent me into hyper-analyzing mode. 

So how do we go about hearing things the way that they are meant?  It would save me a great deal of time and hurt feelings / misperceptions.


Looking for a Night Med

24 Mar

I’ve had this cold for the past 6ish days and it’s kicking my butt at night.  I wake up coughing and feeling like I’m drowning.  I’ve tried Nyquil, Alka-Seltzer Night Time Severe Cold and Tylenol Multi-Symptom Cold Nighttime.  And nothing is working.

I still wake up in the middle of the night coughing and unable to sleep.  Nyquil has given me a round of insomnia like no other.  I don’t even think that the Tylenol worked because I was awake at midnight (after having taken the initial dose at 8pm) to give myself another dose. 

So what can I take?  I’m really wanting a solid, deep sleep because I think that that is all it will take to kick this cold.  If there are any secret family recipes or ‘no-fail’ solutions, I’m all ears.

I had an amazing weekend

15 Mar

I had an amazing weekend.  Friday night my brother, boyfriend  and I all went to the local AAA hockey game. We got great seats and just had a blast.

Saturday my sister, mother, brother and boyfriend conspired to make me get some rest.  My boyfriend and I went to go run some errands that he needed to take care of mid-morning on Saturday and stopped and got lunch while we were out. So we were out from say 10:20-12:30. We had to be back to my house by 12:30 because my boyfriend had to go run a couple more errands and I was just exhausted.   

So I walk into the house and I notice that it’s really quiet. Very unusual. I look over at the dog’s crates and notice that the black comforter that I usually keep over the top of their crates is moved. There’s a note on top. Basically it’s a note from Jersey and Stanley saying that they know that I’ve been really worn out lately and that they are going to go play with friends and will be back on Sunday. My sister, mother and boyfriend all conspired to get me out of the house, take my dogs, take them to daycamp, board them overnight and exhausting them on Sunday.

It was such an incredible gift – the gift of time and sleep. And that’s pretty much all I did on Saturday – well, the weather was warm enough that my boyfriend  took the doors off of his Jeep and pulled the top 1/2 way back so we went driving around for a while when the sun was out. It was awesome.

 Sunday I spent on the ambulance and we had a pretty cake day then too. Only 1 call in 12 hours but I got the time to clean out my car and do the windows….something I’d been intending on doing for almost a year now….no time like the present, huh?

One big, fat step past annoyed

11 Mar

I moved into my house in August 2009.  Honestly, I love the house.  I love its quirks, idiosyncrasies and it’s character.  If I could pick the house up and move it, I would do that in a heartbeat.

Since December, I have had 4 separate incidents occur at my house that make me feel uneasy-to-freaked-out to stay there.

Incident #1:  Guy shows up at my door at around 10pm.  He’s looking for money and knows that I’m ‘that white girl that runs with those two dogs’.

Incident #2:  Come home and find a rather big guy standing outside my house staring at it.  I was in my car and I flash my high beams at him to get him to move.  He gets pissed and we get into a yelling match.

Incident #3:  Had my family and boyfriend over for dinner and the same guy from Incident #2 is drunk and walking amongst the cars parked on my driveway.  He’s looking in the windows and whatnot.  My boyfriend goes outside and gets him to leave.

Incident #4:  Last night – my boyfriend and I are hanging out, watching TV when we hear a loud noise.  Boyfriend goes outside and discovers that my garage had been broken into.  Thankfully nothing had been taken but we were HOME when this occurred.  Some dude just brazenly opened up my fence (as my garage is located behind my fence) and broke in.  I think nothing was taken because there was nothing of significant value in the garage.   I think it’s the audacity more than anything else that really bothers me.  If that person is willing to do that, what more are they willing to do?

I am out of my house for long periods of time on a regular basis – whether it is for work or rescue.  I already have an alarm system in my house that I arm every time I leave the house.  I already do not feel comfortable running in my neighborhood…and I won’t run at dusk or at dark.  So if I don’t get home when it’s still light out, I won’t run outside.

My lease is up at the end of July and I can’t wait to move.  Just so I can feel safe in my own house.

A Code is a Code Except When It’s Not

4 Mar

I’m going to get on a soapbox for a hot second about a call that we had on Tuesday night (during the rain / sleet / snow / slushy roads Nor’Easter).

 We get a call at one of the local ‘rehabilitation centers’ – one that I call Catatonic Manor because the residents always appear doped to the gills and in a catatonic state for a cardiac arrest, CPR in progress. The notes of the call say that the patient is cool to the touch, not breathing and no pulse. Case comments go on to say that the staff is doing CPR and that they have the situation under control.

 Remember – this is at a nursing home / rehabilitation center so theoretically at least, the staff has some medical training. They are supposed to be RNs, LPNs, CNAs – you know things that require tests and certifications and licensures and stuff. At least they should have their CPR certification. And what’s the first step of determining if CPR is warranted? You look, listen and feel for 3-5 seconds to see if the patient is breathing. You follow that up with 2 breaths (assuming not breathing) and then take a pulse at the carotid artery for 60 seconds. Naturally, if your patient is breathing, you do not give them any breaths and you can be assured that they have a pulse. ‘

Anyways, I digress – back to the call – it’s us, the paramedic fire truck, 2 paramedic zone cars and our field supervisor going to this call. We get there and the fire truck is already on scene. We grab the bulk of our cardiac arrest equipment and head in. We find a patient alive – meaning breathing, pulse – but unresponsive. Teeth had clenched down, pupils were pin-point and there wasn’t a damn soul doing CPR. So WTF about that whole thing of ‘staff is doing CPR and that they have the situation under control’? Other than the firefighters in the room, there isn’t a nurse, tech or janitor in the immediate line-of-sight.

We get her in the back of the ambulance after letting everybody and their brother know that this is NOT a cardiac arrest and it is determined that the patient has had a seizure.

I believe in very few black and whites in EMS. But whether you are dead or alive is one of them. If you have no pulse and are not breathing – technically you are dead. If you’ve had a seizure and still have a pulse and are breathing – no matter how crappy or insufficient those respirations are – you are still alive.